English Bloopers

For today’s Daily Prompt, I am going to highlight some of the very common English bloopers occurred in my part of India.

Speaking in English, is a sign of being educated and cultured, in India. Not being able to speak English is a significant source of inferiority complex among a lot of people. 

For the most part, these were English mishaps that happened, when non-English speaking teachers tried hard to speak the language. In fact, some of them are so common, that it seems everyone had this teacher who might have said this..

  • Perhaps the most common.. On summer days in India, in the absence of air conditioning, windows stay open. I am talking about the windows, which have cabinet style doors on them.  If they are closed.. the teacher would say.. “Open the doors of the windows and let the atmosphere/Air Force come in”.
  • A geometry teacher would nonchalantly say “Draw a circle of any shape”. (He meant circle of any size).
  • A physics teacher would say “Take a copper wire of any metal”.
  • A math teacher was fascinated by the word “generally”.. While teaching Algebra to students, he said “13 times 7 is generally 91”. And you thought mathematics is definitive. That guy must have had a Sales and Marketing background. With a little push, it can be 92..
  • A teacher mad at his students for not doing the homework..“Only those who have finished the homework will get entry to the class. Others Dis-Entry”.
  • A teacher was mad at the students for being late to school. The scared students asked.. “Are you going to report this to our parents”. The teacher said “Obliviously”.. He meant “Obviously”.
  • Literal translation from Hindi that means do not bother me early in the morning.“Morning Morning, don’t rotate my head”.
  • Describing my family… I have two girls, both are daughters.
  • Ya’ll make the decision.. Both of you three, get out of the class.

Here I am making fun of my teachers. But they have played a significant role in making me the person, I am today. I am grateful for all they did for me. And that includes some uncanned laughs. 

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